Understandably so, this is not always the easiest thing to do, but very many times it is so very worth it in the end.
1) You don’t end up wasting your very valuable time on circular conversations that have no end or solution (and are often times rooted in blame, shaming, and the desire to make you feel poorly).
2) Defending yourself against someone who WANTS you to be the fall guy/gal of the fallout will not change their opinion, and their opinion does not matter to begin with. What matters is how you feel about yourself, in the end.
-And- 3) When someone comes at you hostilely, defensively, or damningly, they are seeking a rise out of you in some form or fashion — to anger you, hurt you, weaken you, or damage you — and *nothing* tells them that they are unable to do so better than responding with the response of not responding.
Silence (when not about important matters and broader issues) is the ultimate act of spine and integrity. Silence IS sometimes golden, as the saying goes. Have true grit for those who have not found their stoutheartedness, yet. If they have it in them, your example could just guide them to finding it. Go Gallant!
~ Heather Angelika
Owner/Founder of Gallant Girls